– oh hi there, I am alive –

Hello blog world and whoever the hell actually reads this. I’ve had about a month long hiatus, for no reason in particular other than being busy, and tired, and then more busy, and more tired. I do not understand how mom bloggers do this frequently and like mom at the same time. In the past month my son has turned 6 and we threw him a lego birthday party so I was busy prepping for that with decor and what not, I hosted Easter for the first time ever, we had Spring Break (my parents took the kids for a few days and the hubs and I had a little getaway in Del Mar, we’ve had doctor appointments, colds, double ear infections, etc, etc, broken dog legs, family quarrels, etc, etc, oh and obviously Disneyland trips!
Between all of that I didn’t feel witty enough to give you actual quality material. I still don’t, but I figured I’d drop in and say HI I AM STILL ALIVE! Just busy!
But as of today I signed up for the gym, where I’ll be able to drop the babes at the daycare for 2 hours, work out for one of them and then maybe get a little me time during the other. Maybe I’ll devote some of that time to entertaining you lovely folks. Or maybe the gym will just help me gain some clarity and be able to better time manage my life? Who knows! Guess we will see. In the meantime here are some pics from the past month to get you by.

Xo, -Married Single Mama

– first I drink the coffee, then I do the things –

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This is how my toddler insisted on riding in the cart at Trader Joes

My hair is currently air drying from the shower I took two hours ago (not because I have thick hair, but because I literally just took it out of the turban towel I’ve had on my head for an hour and a half), I shaved my legs today for the first time in a week, I’ve changed my clothes 3 times thanks to my toddler, I’m on my 3rd cup of coffee at 12pm, I’ve been up since 5:45AM (which is sleeping in for me because said toddler gets up at 5am, but slept in til 6:30 today! No I was awake because my husbands alarm went off and he’s that type that has three alarms set for every few minutes and snoozes each one several mother effing times), I’ve done several loads of laundry, cleaned the kitchen, gone to Trader Joe’s and Target, picked up the floor in the playroom twice (with the intention of mopping while the 2 year old napped, but I decided that my hairy legs took precedent to having a clean floor), all while feeding the growing 5 and 2 year old 173 snacks, breakfast and lunch (they didn’t really eat that many snacks, they would if I let them have a free for all in the pantry, but they’ve definitely asked for 173 snacks, or in toddler talk “mama nom nom! NOM NOM!!!”)…… I’m also counting down the hours til it’s acceptable for me to pour myself a glass of wine. If your wine time coincides with when you get your school aged child home from school, then we could potentially be best friends. If you also realized that my title for this post is from Gilmore Girls, then we could definitely be best friends.

This post I wanted to point out some of the normal day to day things that I do, not that I go to Target every day (my husband would probably divorce me if I did that). My son had me up at 2:30am this morning because he had a stomach ache, now if you talk to me regularly then you know his stomach ache is something of the norm lately. So I simply pulled him in to bed with us and he went back to sleep, I wasn’t so fortunate so I laid in bed looking at some other mommy blogs on my phone and I stumbled across one that was a single mother who wrote a post a couple years ago on how offended she is by the term “married single parent”. I apologize if I offend single parents by using this term, trust me I praise you for being a single parent and honestly have no idea how you do it. One of my very close friends is a single parent and I think the world of her and the job she is doing to raise her son. Any way back to this other single parent that takes extreme offense because of married people using this term, she claims it casts single parenthood in a negative light. I am definitely not trying to do that in any way, I am simply emphasizing how compound my role as a mother is because I’m alone with my children 90% of the time. I will never dismiss how hard it is to be a single parent, if anything I will buy you a drink and reiterate to you a thousand times that you are a God.

With that said, I started this blog to express myself in a satirical manner to help me cope and learn to be a better ‘married single parent’ for my babes. Also just to jot down the daily wit that spills from the kids mouths, the frustrations I entail with have little to zero adult interaction throughout the entire day, and the all around joys of motherhood. There will be a lot of sass, probably a lot of crying on my part (luckily you won’t have to see that, unless you want to, I mean I won’t mind the company), AND us exploring our new city in Southern California (we’ve been here for almost two months so you’re just joining us for the fun part).

Enjoy the ride, I know I will.

Xo, – The Married Single Mama

Coffee, Coffee, Coffee.. Oh hi there.

Hi! I’m Jen, the married single mama of this site. Most people would eye roll over me saying ‘married single mama’, go right ahead, I don’t care. I have a husband, he’s amazing (he drives me crazy most of the time, but he’s pretty amazing) and we’ve been together for 7 years, married for 6 and have known each other for 10+ years. We have a 5 year old boy (turning 6 in April) and a 2 year old daughter (she thinks she’s 5 too).

I have an extremely short attention span, so fingers crossed that I can actually stick with this blog. (Insert two year old trying to do a flip off the bed here)

Back to the amazing husband. And why I refer to myself as a married single mama. Adam is a chef, for a very large resort property here in Southern California, he’s typically gone by 7am and isn’t home until 8pm/9pm and sometimes 10pm. This is not a set schedule. Most of the time it’s 5 days a week, but it does happen that it’s 6 days a week. His days off aren’t always consecutive, and they’re rarely ever on the weekend. He works his ass off (not literally because it’s actually grown with how much walking and stairs he does at work) for me to be able to be a stay at home mom and raise my two kiddos to be respectable human beings and not add to the asshole population of today’s world. 

Even when he is home, he is constantly attending to emails or texts regarding work, it makes it really hard to be me. The kids view me as their one and only lifeline, it’s “mom I need a drink”, “mom I need a snack”, “mom I need my butt wiped”, “mom my nipple hurts”, the list could go on forever, and happens when I leave them in the room with their dad so I can go pee in peace, or put laundry away without the toddler pulling it all back out of the drawers, or god forbid take a bubble bath. I literally want to scream at the top of my lungs “GO ASK YOUR DAD!!” Which sometimes I do, I’m not going to lie, not at the top of my lungs, but I do lose my shit occasionally. Especially when Adam will be standing in the kitchen and they come to me on the next floor up (or worse, YELL from the floor where the kitchen is) saying they want a snack or drink. It makes me want to march down there hold their eyes open and be like “LOOK, DAD IS RIGHT HERE NEXT TO THE PANTRY AND THE FRIDGE AND HE WILL PROBABLY GIVE YOU SOMETHING LESS HEALTHY THAN I WOULD!” 

Sadly this is all time I have to write today, actually have to go fully do the mom thing because I keep getting princesses thrown at me after she rips their clothes off and wants them back on, also should stop her from hitting her brother because he’s pretending Optimus prime is peeing in her castle.

Toodles for now!

Xo, Married Single Mama